Happy Father’s Day to all the great Dads out there. Whether you are a baseball Dad, a guitar hero Dad, or a new Dad with no idea what you are up against, today is your day to be recognized. I want to say that being a Dad is the greatest thing to ever happen to me and I wear the D badge with honor. Special HFD to my Dad, who is still cracking jokes, smarter than the average bear, and living for the moment every single day.

So, baseball Dads, especially Dads new to taking their kid(s) to a baseball game, I wanted to write this blog specifically for you. Also, if it has been a while since the last time you took your kid(s) to a minor league or professional MLB (Major League Baseball) game, here is the news you need to know. The modern MLB and Minor League game moves at a record pace of play. Meaning – from the first pitch of the game to the final out in the 9th inning, you are looking at a time frame of about 2 hours and 30 minutes on average. Some games finish closer to the 2 hour mark. Why is this data important for your next game experience as a Dad bringing your family to a game?

Because your kid(s) want and need food from a food vendor or concession stand during the game. And will most likely need to use the restrooms once, twice, several times during the game. And will require a souvenir hat, shirt, something to commemorate their being at the game. And you will need to go either with them or by yourself (if they are age allowed to be alone or with another parent or guardian or sibling) for one or all of these tasks. And do it all within 2 hours and 30 minutes, and sometimes less time. Mission impossible, you might ask, well not if you are strategically and mentally prepared to tackle this important Dad trait – taking care of your family’s needs.

Alright Dads, here is some free advice from someone who has tried and failed and succeeded and given up and lived to laugh about beating the modern game’s pace of play to provide delicious hot dogs and fries and fuzzy #1 finger thingies for his kids over the years:

• Purchase general admission tickets so you can pretty much sit anywhere in the park where there is an open seat. Most stadiums have a grassy area in the outfield, I would advise seating there. “Grassy spot over there kids…looks like home run baseball depot!”
• Get to the game early for concession stand, restroom, and souvenir shop area reconnaissance and make mental notes of where everything is in relation to your seats. “Why are we hear 30 minutes before game time, why is the sky blue, I don’t know we just are.”
• Pre-game, walk the kids around the concession stand locales near your seating and gauge their interest and find out what they would order, should you be ordering for them at that very second of time. “Hey, that chicken finger combo looks good, eh?”
• As you are sitting down for the first time, inform the kid(s) that whenever they need something, to let you (Dad) know and use the recon mission’s data to support this fact “So, kids getting food during the game will be very difficult, so if you want something now, speak up before I sit down, meaning get comfortable.”
• Relay the recon data about the souvenir shop being wicked busy during the game. “From my experience here, it would be better to shop post-game so you (meaning the kid(s)) don’t missing any important game action.” Inside voice, “me neither.”
• As you are standing and finishing your briefing on the food and stadium crap, I mean souvenirs, mention that the bathrooms will also be super crowded with folks having to go because its hot. “Also kids, adult folks (inside voice, Like Dad once) tend to drink a lot of adult beverages during hot and humid games, like today.” Even if you are attending a night game, the concept of drinking and games still applies.
• Be prepared to sit down, rise and stand for the national anthem, then get comfortable for the first pitch to be thrown, and for the first request to come raining into your queue by one or all of your kids. When this happens, just take a deep breathe and do your Dad duties. “Ok, does everyone want a chicken finger combo?”

And off you go to the concession stands. First pitch in and you are already on Dad duty providing for your family. My advice, just take a deep breathe and cherish those moments. Get in line, chat it up with other Moms and Dads and fans in line who are also missing the game or trying to catch it on the small TV above the food vendor stand. Make sure you get plenty of napkins and dipping sauces and do it with a smile. You will not be happy if you have to go back for an item that you could have gotten the first time!

Because here is the reality new Dads – One day, your kid will get their own food, then they will get their own ticket to the game (maybe without you), and eventually will drive themselves to the game (maybe without you), and they will go to the game without you and those are not happy days, trust me. Kids grow up, that is a reality, so cherish every moment when they need you because it won’t last forever.

So baseball Dads, as I salute you on Father’s Day, my advice during this world record pace of play at professional baseball parks is buy general admission tickets, get to the game early, poll your kid(s) on what they want to eat, find the restrooms, find a spot in the grass in the outfield, overspend on that foam finger in the souvenir shop, and through it all – just breathe it all in. And build those wonderful memories of going to the park when your kids needed you to for those Dad duties, and you did them because the best Dads take care of their families. You can catch up on the game recap on your phone, with the other fans in line, pretty much any time. Kids grow up far faster than this new pace of play baseball world, so don’t miss out on it by having a bad attitude.

By the way, your kid told me he has to use the restroom, again!!!